


Fragile

by deniserity



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Coupzi, Dark Aura of writing, Dying man, Eventual Fluff, Happy Ending?, Jicheol, Little bit of jihan, M/M, Narrative
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-28
Updated: 2016-12-28
Packaged: 2018-09-12 22:51:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9094216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deniserity/pseuds/deniserity
Summary: Also crossposted in wattpad and AFF





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Also crossposted in wattpad and AFF

FRAGILE  
Chapter I : How are yous

(1)

All things are bound to end but his life wasnt meant to end just like this. This is so unfair. Plain unfair.

In the age of 22, his life would end, how sweet that end is?

But truly, it isnt about how short he had lived that made him think this is unfair, its all about the moment he wasnt able to experience, all the things he was not given a chance to say. 

Seungcheol laughed at his own thought.

What a desperate move to blame the situation when it's all his fault, just because he was scared.

\-----

"So what do you want to do with your life now?" Mr. Choi ask in a more than sweet tone that Seungcheol hears for the first time.

This is new to Seungcheol, Mr. Choi asking what he want is not what the typical Mr. Choi would do.

So, this is the advantages a dying man gets.

Seungcheol thought for a minute. What does he want with his remaining what.. months? Weeks? Days?

He squeezed his eyes shut and he literally want to bang his head in the table in front of him.

"Let me think, give me 2 months" he answered.

Ironic enough, he was given a verdict of 2 months.

Will I just drop dead after the hands of the clock hit the 2 months and 1 second mark? I wonder.

\-----

"The arrangements are good, but we cant accept it" replied the production company where he sent his composition.

"Can I ask why?" Jihoon typed right away.

He stared at the monitor for almost like half a minute but still got no response from them. It was mere half a minute but it tortured Jihoon. 

Why is it that all of them rejected his work? I didnt study music for 4 years just to be rejected. Hes in the top of their batch, he even had a song produced way back in their Senior days.

-New message received-

His phone notified him. Knowing this is from the production company, he quickly opened it.

"Good Day Mr Lee Jihoon. We are sorry to say that we cant accept the composition you sent to Pledis Production. Our production thought that this composition lacks something. Sunlight was your first produced composition and it was a hit. There is something about Sunlight that made people listen to it, the song made them feel the love, its as if theyre the one who felt those flowery feeling of being inlove and thats the thing your composition lacks.

You are always welcome to send your compositions to us but keep in mind that we dont just accept a song that is good, we accept songs that have an impact when the listener hears it. Find your inspiration, Mr Lee Jihoon. Fighting!"

He threw his phone in the bed and next his body, he looked up to see the vast emptiness of his ceiling.

He desperately looks for the answer, why is Sunlight a hit? Why can't he make another composition that portrays a feeling just like Sunlight?

What is it that he lack, what is it that he had in their Senior years that resulted to a feeling the Sunlight brought?

And that moment, he knew he should stop. If he would go deeper into his mind, he might find the answer and it scares him.

He hears a faint thud outside his room, once he was outside his room he found out that the thud was coming from the door. Someones knocking.

He wasnt expecting anyone so he decided to ignore it but the person knocking thought otherwise, he or she is still knocking.

Pissed, he open the door and there standing in front of him is Mr. Choi.

"Greetings Mr. Lee Jihoon, you probably know me right? Weve met once"

Jihoon is flustered by the fact that Mr. Choi is standing in front of him, never in his life would he imagine having him pay a visit in his apartment, not after Jihoon and Mr. Choi's son broke up.

"Can I come in?" Mr. Choi asks.

Jihoon just nod his head and Mr. Choi proceeded to enter his house and found a seat in Jihoon's living room.

He quickly followed, "What do you want Mr. Choi? Tea, Juice, Coffee or water?" Jihoon offers.

"No, dont mind me. Im just here for a little talk"

Jihoon cant hide his surprised face. And now Mr. Choi wants to talk? I dont understand, why would he want to talk to me?

"I heard all your compositions were rejected?"

Jihoons train of thought was interrupted by what Mr. Choi said. He sat in front of Mr. Choi, he didnt bother answering Mr. Choi's question.

"You know, I know someone from Pledis Production. Thats your dream right? To produced a song in Pledis production? I can make that easy for you"

He didn't understand a thing. He just sat there dumbfounded.

Mr. Choi fished out something from his attaché case, a pile of papers.

He puts it at the table in front of him.

"You see, here are contracts you need to sign to be a producer in Pledis and I got all of this for you." 

He looked at the papers and to Mr. Choi.

"Excuse me but what do you think you're doing right now?"

"Oh sorry, I haven't clearly stated my agenda in visiting you. Im assuring your future right now but you would have to grant me a little favor, Mr Lee" Mr. Choi said as if its a business matter he's dealing with.

\-----

"Father, what are we doing here? I just want to lay in bed back in the house" Seungcheol said.

Mr. Choi and Seungcheol is in a café, his father said they were meeting someone.

"What's the point of me accompanying you? I don't have a business in here"

"Well, in fact Seungcheol I'm the one accompanying you"

Seungcheol raised a brow, intrigued.

And his father suddenly stands up, "Oh, glad you could make it." 

Seungcheol turn his head to see a pink haired small guy, Jihoon.  
His heart skipped a bit, his hearing was wirey, he didn't hear a thing, he doesn't care. Jihoon was like how he remembered, it was one year when he last seen him but he still remember every nook and cranny of the boy. He can't forget, he did not even try.

"Good Morning, Mr. Choi" Jihoon proceeded in the seat next to Mr. Choi.

He did not realized it but his mouth was wide open and he's staring into the depths of Jihoon's face. He can't help, he'd been wanting to see this face for so long.

"Good Morning" Jihoon's greeting aimed at Seungcheol.

He looked at his father, looking for an answer as to why Jihoon is here. He doesn't trust his voice, it might not come out as he want. He would've blurted out "I miss you"

"Okay, that's the end of me accompanying you Seungcheol. Mr. Lee here will tell you everything. Goodbye Seungcheol, Goodbye Mr. Lee"

He took a step farther away from them but came back to whisper into Jihoon's ear which Jihoon replied with a nod.

Silence.

On the contrary, it was not really that silent in here. The people in other tables around them were having their conversation but he was focused to Jihoon that he can't hear a single thing. He badly wants to hear Jihoon talk.

Seungcheol racked his brain for the words he want to say to Jihoon. First in the list is I miss you, You look so fine wearing a sweater, should I order your favorite blend of coffee, how are you in the past year, I like your pink hair, are you real?

"How are you and Soonyoung?"  
That's the word he said, not even in the list but that's the word he said. And maybe the dumbest word that came out of his mouth.

Jihoon seems shocked by the question but eventually his eyes turned to crescent.

"Great" he simply replied. "How are you and Jeonghan?" He adds.

"Excellent" it came out cheery.

He didn't know why he said that. There were no Jeonghan and Seungcheol, never had but maybe because his heart was broken by what Jihoon said that he said it as a defense mechanism.

\-----

Oblivious, the two said those words as a defense mechanism but it came out as an offense which hurt the both of them.

❌


	2. Chapter 2

FRAGILE  
Chapter II: Unspoken Pain and Longing

(2)

Still beautiful.

That's how Jihoon sees Seungcheol sitting across him. 

They had broken up a year ago but Jihoon always felt like it was only yesterday. Sure, the pain also felt like it came from a fresh wound but he would happily welcome the pain if it means he would also feel like the happiness they felt with each other. That those moments were still fresh and happened not long ago.

"Good Morning" he greeted Seungcheol. Desperate to hear him talk.

But he didn't.

"Okay, that's the end of me accompanying you Seungcheol. Mr. Lee here will tell you everything. Goodbye Seungcheol, Goodbye Mr. Lee" Mr. Choi said as he was ready to leave but came back to whisper into Jihoon's ear.

"Tell him nothing" which he replied with a nod.

Silence...

It gave Jihoon the opportunity to study Seungcheol more. He is still the same but it's obvious that he lose weight.

"How are you and Soonyoung?" Seungcheol suddenly speak those words.

He was taken aback, he did not know what to answer. But soon his pride kicks in, as much as he want to say that he hadn't moved on yet worst he did not even try, he can't bare to say such confessions.

Fuck pride.

He smiled "Great, how are you and Jeonghan?" 

He swear he had his fingers crossed, wishing there were nothing, that they simply broke up because Seungcheol doesn't want him anymore. Jihoon don't want to confirm it himself.

"Excellent" he said in a cheerful tone.

Great. That broke his heart, again.

"So, I'll be explaining why I'm here" he said.

He was ready to tell the lies and all of the nothings.

\-----

"Your father came to my house and offered a deal with me" Jihoon started.

Seungcheol was intently looking, he won't miss any words that Jihoon would said. He'll find any evidence that he is missed.

"I will take care of you in, hmmm, say, 1 and a half months and ---"

He halts Jihoon's explanation by raising both of his hand and motioned for him to stop.

"T-take care of me? Why?"

Jihoon looked up, he seems like thinking "Well, your father said you are sick and it'll take at least 1 and a half month for your sickness to left you so I'll be taking care of you till then" 

Oh. So my father didn't told him. Is that a relief? Can I just use my ace card as a dying man to bring Jihoon back? That thought crossed his mind but he pushed those thoughts at the most back of his mind.

The time you know you'll lose nothing, despair is your company.

"Hm- Kay, what about the deal?" He asked, dead curious as to what convinced Jihoon to take this offer.

"H-he'll make me a producer in Pledis." Jihoon said not meeting Seungcheol's eyes.

"So you're saying, my father contracted you to take care of me in less than 2 months and in exchange of that he'll plant a word in Pledis Production, he'll make you a producer in there, is that what you're trying to say?"

Jihoon nodded.

Seungcheol let out a breath of frustration.

Of course, how come he'll want to see me. That's a stupid anticipation I had right there.

"So you're doing all of this because of what my father will give in exchange?" He asked again.

Maybe.

Just maybe he heard it wrong.

"Y-yes" Jihoon confirmed.

And Seungcheol laughed enough to be heard in the whole cafe. His laughter envelops the cafe which caught everyone's attention most especially Jihoon.

Why am I laughing? Because this is just a fucking joke. He needs to laugh to a joke right? He needed to. He must. He knew how Jihoon hated how his jokes were not funny enough to make him laugh.

Seungcheol had tears in his eyes when he stopped laughing. Thanks to his laughs, he can disguise this tears of pain as tears of joy.

"I wonder what made father choose you, did he say his reason?"

"Huh-? Uhhhh, I also don't know"

That old man must've known that he still loves Jihoon. Seriously, that old man.

"What if I don't want to be taken care of?" 

I want to be with you so bad.

Jihoon was shocked, his eyes suddenly are round and he struggle to find the right words to say "Huh? If that's what you want then"

Should he stay or walk away?  
I'm dying anyways, I should not think of the consequences.

"I want you to start next week, pack everything you have and about the time frame, let's change it from less than 1 and half a month to Seungcheol-will-decide" 

"Oh, if that's what you want" 

"Okay. I think that's enough talking for now, a driver will just pick you up in your apartment. Goodbye"

Seungcheol wants to leave this suffocating place, he can't bare look at Jihoon for another second. He might just breakdown and kneel before him, beg him to come back.

"Okay. Goodbye"

Jihoons sticked out his hand.  
Seungcheol looked at it. I love those slender fingers, he thought.

"I'm sorry but I don't like being touched" Seungcheol said as he stood up.

"Goodbye again" 

He turned his back.

Let's see each other again, Jihoonie.

\-----

"He sure hates me a lot" Jihoon said to himself.

He was alone now in their table, Seungcheol left him just awhile ago.

He reached for the phone inside his jeans' pocket and called Soonyoung.

"Soonyoung, I'm right next to your workplace. Can you at least send Seokmin here?"

The other line's loud. The office must be full of works. Soonyoung is an heir of an international company and is being trained for the position. Seokmin, his boyfriend and his driver, the three of them are good friends even till now.

"Ayo Jihoon~ What are you doing near my workplace? Oh ho. Don't tell me you're waiting for me. Tsk tsk, I'm loyal to Seokmin and also I'm busy right ----"

"I met up with Seungcheol" He interrupted Soonyoung's talk, hearing cheerful voice makes him more weary than he already is.

He felt that the other line suddenly shifted to serious mode " Why'd you meet up with him? Tsh. At this rate, you won't reach your apartment in one piece. You might end up collapsing the moment you step out of there"

"That's what I'm telling you. Kindly pick me up Soon. Im hurt so bad" he said in an almost pitiful voice.

"Okay. Okay. I'll go with Seokmin, wait me there."

He hanged up

The scenery out the windows were something those from a painting, sun brightly shining but there were clouds to provide shade, trees were dancing with the wind and leaves fell off the tree as they can't endure how the strong wind pass through them. 

Can I just be a leaf? Can I just let go when I can't endure it anymore?

"Jihoon, you should've told us what table you are in. You're small, you're giving my Seokmin a hard time looking for you" Soonyoung in front of him said in between pants.

He ignored the insult in between those words, he'll save it for another day.

"This is real bad, normal Jihoon would kill the hell out of me the moment I said the s word. Seokmin, hurry we really should drop Jihoon to his apartment" 

Seokmin came running and helped Jihoon stands up his seat. He didn't realized his legs had turned jelly, feels so foreign to even stand up.

"No dirty business Jihoon. Don't go to the kitchen, don't get something pointy. Don't take too much medicines, don't drink your detergent. Okay?" Seokmin said as he is dropped off into his apartment.

"I'm not suicidal Seokmin. I'm sure I'm in my right mind. I still need to kick Soonyoung's butt for calling me sm-- mini size." 

He was supposed to say that in a somewhat lively tone or how his normal tone is but it came out sullen, as if his souls were taken from him.

"Okay. Just know, you can call us anytime right? You can do it" Seokmin said in a voice that said "You're-Lee-Jihoon-You're-tough"

They bid their goodbye and Jihoon finally closed the doors.

As soon as it was closedd, he let himself fall off the floor. He unconcealed the thin mask he was wearing until then, he let himself crumple in vulnerability.

"I didn't thought meeting you again would feel so happy and painful at the same time"

His body turned numb but he can feel the hot tears falling down, he can't recognize now if of happiness or pain.

He recalled how Seungcheol answered the question about him and Jeonghan cheerfully, how he did not even let Jihoon touched his hand, how all the things he longed for has given him pain.

He did not even do a thing but he feels so weary, he can sleep at the floor he was in right now. He can feel his eyelids getting heavier and heavier, maybe he'll regain his strength the next day. For now, he can just sleep at the floor. So he did.

But before his drowsiness ate him up the only thing he could think of was how it feels like to be with the man you love, again.

\-----

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ❌  
> [A/N: It's slow paced. *hides* Kindly tell me what you think ㅠ ㅠ It means a lot for me]


	3. Chapter 3

Fragile  
Chapter III: Daffodils, Anemones and Tulips (D.A.T )

(3)

Jihoon literally packed all his belongings in his apartment. It wasn't even a little evident that someone use to live here a few seconds ago. It was like those rooms used as a show room with minimal to no furnitures.

A week passed since his talk and agreement with Mr. Choi and now he'll spent his days with Seungcheol. That thought got him worked up, tho he don't have any idea how short or long it is.

He fetch a notebook, it was binded and has a floral cover. Jihoon hates anything about floral especially floral patterns in any of his belongings but Seungcheol is really into flowers. You can ask him what flower it is you're seeing and he'll tell you anything about it, it's blooming season, family the flower belong, it's meaning, how long is the flower existing on earth or who the flower dates-- literally everything about it. What a bluky, muscular, athletic man likes about flower so much? Seungcheol once said "The moment I saw you, a nagging voice told me I should know everything about it. In that way I could understand you because you are the most beautiful flower I've ever seen in my whole life".

Most beautiful flower, eh? He smiled bitterly, Jihoon must've been a withered flower in Seungcheol's eyes and he saw Jeonghan as a fully blosseomed flower.

He calmed his mind, it's not good to be thinking about those things.

[⏳]

"Happy Anniversarry Jihoonie~" Seungcheol said excitedly.

Jihoon was taken in a for-rich-only restaurant by Seungcheol, and honestly this is the first time he'd been inside something like this, for the record he's not rich.

The restaurant was big but there seems to be no customer today and the whole interior of the restaurant was altered by a childish designs which is a contrast to how the restaurant should look like.

"Did you rent the whole place Seungcheol?" he asked.

He knew it was rude of him to ask that question first before saying Happy Anniversary back but he was not used to something like this. he'll prefer they stay in his apartment with some sort of a personal celebration with just the two of them and they'll just snuggle for the whole day. That's the ideal celebration for Jihoon --- to have Seungcheol all by himself.

"Yeah, isn't it amazing? Come, let's sit" 

Seungcheol carefully pulled him in the table in the center where there is a candlelight dinner with some violinist beside it.

Seungcheol pulled the chair for Jihoon. What a romanticist. But deep inside he like it. He like everything about Seungcheol.

"You haven't said Happy Anniversary back Jihoonie~" Seungcheol said as they sat down and pouts.

"You're not cute. Stop doing that" He said teasing Seungcheol.

"Eyyyy~ You're still not saying Happy Anniversary back"

"Okay. Okay! Happy Anniversary Cheolie" he said in the most sincere voice he could manage.

Seungcheol looked satisfied with it. He clapped his hand twice and on cue the violinists besid ethem starts playing some romantic melody and a waiter came with a notebook in his hand.

"Sir" said the waiter as he handed the notebook to Seungcheol.

"As much as I want to eat already, I wanna give my anniversary gift to you first Jihoonie~" said Seungcheol and placed the notebook in the table.

He looked at the notebook "You know, I'm not a materialistic person"

Seungcheol nods " I know, I know"

"And it's in fucking floral pattern Seungcheol, you know I hate floral patterns"

He looked sad for a second "But Jihoon, that reminded me of you. That's some beautiful  tulip you got there, you know tulips is a declaration of love"

"No, I don't know that, you're the only weirdo here who knew things about flowers. So who does this flower date? Yellow Bell? Rose? Daffodil?" he said without realizing that he's crticizing Seungcheol gift.

"Fine, if you don't want it" he take the notebook away but Jihoon stopped it just in time.

"Okay. Sorry Cheolie~ You know, I just don't like florals but since you're the one who gave it. I'll give you a ticket of exception" he said aimed to lighten the mood between them and to compensate to what he said but Seungcheol don't seem satisfied.

"You still don't like it"

"What? No! Look, I'm hugging it" he said then hugged the notebook and petals fall from the notebook.

Not that much but maybe 5 or less petals fell. He quickly lift the petals up from the ground.

"Why are there petals in it?" he asked Seungcheol and the other boy just gave him a look that says "Open the notebook"

As he opened the notebook , a few petals fell and to his surprise the notebook was not just an ordinary notebook, it's not blank. There were writings from the first to the last page.

"That's my gift, I wrote all things I want to do with you" 

He flip it more, there were pages that says -- Things to do with our child, things to do at the kitchen, things to do at the sun, things to do when we both are white haired and oldies.

Jihoon was overwhelmed. He was slapped by how rude he act in front of Seungcheol and to his gift.

"I-It's wonderful Seungcheol. I really like it" Jihoon said and he can feel his eyes burning, any minute his tears will fall.

Seungcheol finally smiled.

Jihoon stood up and came closer to where Seungcheol sits.

"And this is my gift for you" he said as he leaned and pressed his lips to Seungcheol's.

That was Jihoon's first kiss.

[⏳/]

\-----

Jihoon, most of the time tried his best not to think about the moment he had with Seungcheol because that's just plain suicide --- to think about something that you don't have anymore but he can't help recalling it all when he sees something that reminds him of Seungcheol. A good example would be, when he sees a dog he'll remember how Seungcheol plays with a stray dog in their college years, or when he saw someone wearing a floral dress for oldies he'll remember the day Seungcheol dressed up as that for the whole day because he lost a bet with Jihoon or when he sees a tree he'll remember how Seungcheol climbed the mango tree to retrieve Jihoon's paper that flew off from the 5th floor. In short, everything reminds him of Seungcheol.

A knock came signalling that the driver is here to pick him up. He carefully put the notebook in his backpack, that'll be his guide.

"Sit at the back seat, Sir" he said as he opened the door for Jihoon.

He starts the engine "One question, Sir. Do you carry a cigarette with you?" asked the driver.

"I don't smoke, sorry" he said.

"Good to hear, Sir"

And they drove silently. Jihoon thought the driver was asking for a cigarette from him but he certainly not so why did he ask?

A rougly 30 minutes later they arrived in a more than familiar house to Jihoon, the Choi's residence.

He got out of the car and goes directly to the compartment, in attempt to get his luggages.

"What are you doing, Sir?"

"I'll be carrying it inside"

"Don't, Sir. I'll be the the one to deliver it to your house with Mr. Young Choi"

"What? Our house?So, I'm not staying here?"

"No, sir. Mr. Young Choi said you'll be with him to a quiet haven uphill"

I'm not staying here. I'll be with Seungcheol in a house with just the two of us. He tried to understand those words.

This seems like his ideal personal celebration

\-----

"Father you remember the tiny house we saw when we came from one of your business trips?" Seungcheol asked a day after his meeting with Jihoon.

"Uhh, yes. I vaguely remember it. Is it the house that stood uphill with no neighbors around it?"

"Yes yes" Seungcheol said cheerfully.

Mr. Choi chew his food "What about it? and please eat your food Seungcheol, you need nutrition"

"You know I don't have the appetite Father, food tastes so bland and I hate chewing. Anyways, buy the house for me, Jihoon and I will live there" he said with a hint of pleading in his voice.

He only discovered it that his Father really cared for him, he realized that what his Father was doing way back then was always for him but he took it as offense all the time and he rcan't recall a moment wherein he gave his Father a chance to be a Father to him. Seungcheol is one of those boys who think that they can handle their life without parent's guidance but now he's craving for a guidance.

The next day, his Father relayed the message that he already bought the house for him. In Seungcheol's excitement he hugged his Father so tight that he can feel his every bone being fractured.

"Seungcheol, you're hurting yourself" says his Father as Seungcheol can't hide his pained expression.

"I'm okay Father. Can I have some people to decorate the house?" he said as he recover from the pain.

"Sure"

-

He was busy giving instructions to the people who'll decorate the house.

"Hmmm. yeah. yeah. Purple and dark motif, yes." He said as he was talking to the phone.

Jihoon likes Purple and he's not into bright colors also.

He dialled another number.

"Hello, are you the one buying the stock for the house?"

"Yes" replied the person on the other line.

"Okay. You got it... your call, you buy whatever you think is necessarry, just don't forget to buy thick dark curtains for the house and coffee, a lot of coffee. Okay. Thank you"

Jihoon's everyday routine is having atleast 1 cup of coffee a day.

He dialled another number, this time the gardener.

"Hello, Yes this is Seungcheol. I would like that our surroundings will be planted with Daffodils and Anemones. Yeah the yellow and purple one... Yes please arrange it beautifully... And also can you put up a swing in one of the trees?... Yes, two swings please.Thank you"

Seungcheol is so anxious, he want this to be perfect for Jihoon. He want to somehow do something that they'll do if they are still together.

Right now, he already accept the fact that after all this, Jihoon will go back to Soonyoung and he'll go to whoever knows. Why shouldn't he accept the fact? This is all his fault anyways.

For the last time he called the person who'll buy the stocks and will repaint the house. At the very least, he want to be remembered as someone who loves Jihoon not someone who hurt him.

-

"Mr. Young Choi, Mr Lee Jihoon is already in your car" said his personal butler.

He was so excited that he almost tripped in a flat surface and luckily that didn't happen. He could've been injured if it had happened.

He saw Jihoon sitting at the passenger seat of his car.

Whoever created pink, I love you Ma'am. It is a color made just for Jihoon. He thought because Jihoon looked so cute with his pink hair, this is the time you wish you can just put him inside your pocket.

He quietly got inside the driver's seat and starts the engine without even batting an eye to look at Jihoon. Too much of a contrast when he was still outside. He was stiff, he's still guilty of all charges to Jihoon. He is ashamed in front of Jihoon.

They were driving silently for about twenty minutes, no one seems to want to say a word. Well, that's so much of a contrast as to what is happening in their minds.

"Can I turn on the stereo, Cheo-- Seungcheol" Jihoon finally broke the silence.

Cheol. Jihoon was about to call him Cheol. He looked like he was just focusing in driving but he was really coming up with a theory that may as well save the Earth from global warming. In a positive note, Cheol may mean that he's still fond of Seungcheol that he can still call him that way, well in a darker note, that's the second syllable of his name, maybe Jihoon hates his name that even saying his whole first name is not something he wants to do.

"Oh-- Okay, If you don't want to"

Seungcheol realized he was just silent whereas Jihoon asked him a question.

"No, no. Please do"

Jihoon turned on the stereo right away and on it a sad song was playing. In it was Beautiful Birds by Passenger and Birdy was playing.

After 3 hours they arrived at their destination. As they got out, even Seungcheol was surprised and amazed by how the house turned out.

It is just how he imagined.

\------

Jihoon loves silence but not this time, not when he is with Seungcheol and all he ever do was shut his mouth. It irritetes Jihoon because that's just like shoving into his face that Seungcheol don't want to talk to you, he don't want to waste his words conversing with you.

"Can I turn on the stereo, Cheo-- Seungcheol"  He said breaking the silence. And shit, he was close to calling Seungcheol the way he call him when they are still together. Well they are not, no point calling him that. 

But Seungcheol didn't answer. He seemed more focussed in driving that before. Ohh, hearing my voice made him focused more, I might be a big distraction to his peaceful driving then.

"Oh-- Okay, If you don't want to" I said because for me his silence means no.

"No, no. Please do" he said so I quickly tuned it on. 

Maybe this'll lighten up the mood between this suffocating space.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [A/N: So? Hope you liked this update~ Please let your presence be felt *cries*
> 
> BTW, [⏳] means flashback and [⏳/] means end of flashback. ]


	4. Chapter 4

FRAGILE  
Chapter IV: Missions

(4)

There were two bedrooms, the larger one is for Seungcheol, that is where he kept all the apparatuses to make his body function until his body refuse to. The smaller just beside the larger room is for Jihoon. Jihoon is the kind of person whose day won't be complete if he hasn't taken a sip of coffee first thing in the morning so Seungcheol instructed that the coffee maker to be put inside Jihoon's room.

There's only one bathroom, that is where the lowkey couple toiletries were kept. A pair of toothbrushes standing proud beside each other, (one is purple and the other is blue), pair of towels wherein their names were embroidered. In the kitchen -- mugs, plates, spoon and forks also come in pair.

This tiny house is perfect for two --- perfect for the two of them.

\-----

"Mr. Song will eventually arrive with our luggages" Seungcheol announced when Jihoon entered the house.

Jihoon looked around the house while Seungcheol stared at him praying that he'll like the interior. But Jihoon kept a straight face and if Seungcheol had seen it right, he saw sad eyes. 

Is it a mission failed?

They wander deeper the tiny house.

"This will be your room" and Seungcheol pointed to the smaller room.  
"Here" he said as he gave the key to Jihoon. For a fleeting moment, their hands brushed against each other and Seungcheol felt electricity running down his spine, he wonder if Jihoon felt it too.

He coughs and he can feel the pain. He can feel it building up his chest and every bone in his body. He turned his back to Jihoon and is now headed to his room when Jihoon stopped him by grabbing his arm. Jihoon didn't use much force but he can feel the pain in it, how single touch could make him crumple and cry the pain out but luckily he is not facing Jihoon that he wouldn't see how distorted his face.

"Where are you going? It's almost lunch time. Let's eat" 

Tempting offer Jihoonie, you don't know how I would like to eat with you everyday but Seungcheol don't want Jihoon to see him in this state.

"I'm not hungry" he said, trying his best so that his pain won't show in his voice. 

Jihoon released his wrist. For a second, Seungcheol want to hold it back, he wouldn't care about the pain, he would just care how Jihoon's touch can make current run down his body and can make all the butterflies in his stomach alive again but he stepped forward toward his room -- away from Jihoon.

He closed the door shut as he entered his room and let his body touch the ground. He cough even more, more painful coughs but he tried his best to held in all the sounds, to keep all his pain inside.

He crawled his way to his bed, it's a good thing for others to sleep away the pain but not for him. As soon as his body got in contact with the soft futon, his body relaxed but he knew all the consequences that he'll endure when he wake up.

He sits unto his bed, still pain stinging inside his chest -- unknown if it's because of his disease or because of Jihoon.

"Leave some my morphine at my door" he sang absent mindedly while he reached for the morphine and water.

As he took the morphine he wishes that it'll also wash away the pain deep down his chest.

\----

This could be our happy little home, Seungcheol, he said to his self while looking around the house.

It made him sad because his little imaginative house came to life but the situation isn't like what he imagined.

"This will be your room" and he pointed to the room in front "Here" as he handed the key to me and it occured , for a split second their hands came in contact with each other. By that single touch he was electrified as he can feel every nerve in his body reacting to his touch, I wonder if Seungcheol felt it too.

But then Seungcheol turned his back on him and he reflexively grabbed his wrist.

Don't turn your back on me again, Seungcheol.

"Where are you going? It's almost lunch time. Let's eat" he said but Seungcheol remained silent for a minute and replied "I'm not hungry"

Jihoon don't have a choice but to let go of Seungcheol and he hurriedly go to the other room, shutting the door in front of him.

He did the same and entered his room with all strength and hope drained out of his body.

He placed his backpack on top of the bedside table and threw his body in the soft embrace of the bed.

"If he keeps on avoiding me, I don't know my purpose in here" his voice tiny.

I'm supposed to take care of him but it might turn out that I'll take care of myself first because he can feel the pain. The pain of being rejected again, the pain of being left out again, the pain of feeling unloved again.

\-----  
It was dark when he came out of his room, still half asleep. 

The house is so eerily quiet and he's having hard time locating the switch of this house.

He blindedly gone straight near the door because that's where the switch is always located. And he found it, "Yes" he said in victory as the lights came to life but still this house is dead inside.

He felt lonely again, he wished this opportunity given to him would turn out into something but turns out to be nothing. He heavily sighed and his stomach growled in frustration because he hasn't eaten lunch and might not be eating dinner too.

But Jihoon got an idea, he rushed inside his room and bring out the notebook given to him by Seungcheol.

"Hmmm, let me see" he said as he flipped the pages carefully.

Things to do at the kitchen, the header of the page said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ❌  
> [A/N: Excuse my not-so-good-English ;; It's not my first language. Let me know what you think. I'm not satisfied with this update ;; It does not came out the way I visualized it ;; that's my fault. Criticisms are welcome.]


	5. Chapter 5

Fragile  
Chapter V: 2nd Day means 2nd...

(5)

He was awaken by a soft touch in his nose.

"Good Morning, sunshine. Did you sleep well?" Said the beaming beautiful creature in front of him.

"I had the greatest time, looking at your face the whole night. You still sleep like an angel Jihoonie~"

Seungcheol sat at the edge of his bed "Cat got your tongue?" He said and laugh fondly at Jihoon

"Okay. I'll go get your breakfast. Stay here, you'll gonna have a breakfast in bed, Jihoonie~" he said and started to walk away from Jihoonie.

"Do-don't go" his voice cracked with desperation.

Seungcheol turned his head to look at Jihoon.

"What? I'm just gonna get your breakfast" he's smiling while saying it.

"I'm not hungry" 

"That won't do. You have to eat, I'm just going out of this door and get your breakfast. It won't take a minute"

Jihoon smiled, permitting Seungcheol to go out of his room and go fetch his breakfast.

60, 59, 58, 57, 56, 55, 54, 53, 52, 51

What is happening in here?

50, 49, 48, 47, 46, 45, 44, 43, 42, 41

Why is being so sweet and kind to me?

40, 39, 38, 37, 36, 35, 34, 33, 32, 31

Why suddenly? But I like it.

30, 29, 28, 27, 26, 25, 24, 23, 22, 21

I like him caring for me, looking at me like I'm his personal treasured possession.

20, 19, 18, 17, 16, 15, 14, 13, 12, 11

I am willing to forget the past if that'll bring him back, back to my arms again.

10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1

I've counted a minute, Seungcheol. Where are you?

"Cheol?" he called out

0, -1, -2, -3, -4, -5, -6, -7, -8, -9

But I guess it won't be that easy. Just because you'll forget about the past doesn't mean the present will go the way you want it to be.

It was soft, not compared to the hard wood he remembered falling asleep. He woke up in the bed, with tears falling down his eyes.

\-----

It's only their second day in here but Jihoon is on the edge. He want Seungcheol so bad that even in his dreams Seungcheol is still invading him, it was quite obvious. Not that he doesn't dream about Seungcheol before, God knows his dream is Seungcheol himself. Would this painful longing stop?

He figured it out instantly when he went out of his room with Seungcheol out of his sight.

"Cheol?" He called out roaming the house and worry is building up in his chest. Sure, there was nothing in this set up between but Jihoon maybe would like to play with his feelings a little.

He halted his tracks when he realized what he just called him. It pained him, he was struck by a cold spear in his heart. Should we play a game where I'll surely enjoy but not for long?

His eyes caught the food he cooked last night, still untouched. If it would make him feel better, it was neatly situated in a plate not the way he left it last night. At least he has the courtesy to refuse it politely, even going to an extent to put it aside neatly.

"Say ahhhhh~" he can hear from outside the house.

That voice is quite familiar. As fast as he would reply to Seungcheol's message, Jihoon went out to see a commotion.

Well, it was a commotion for Jihoon. A rather major commotion that would need the police' assistance or maybe a doctor because he swear a bile is building up inside him. He feel nauseated.

Seungcheol is outside evident that he is watering the flowers a little while ago and then there's Jeonghan feeding Seungcheol. Fucking spoonfeeding Seungcheol without a spoon if that's even possible.

Good. What a bright sunny day. Wah, it's just the perfect way to start the day.

He is slowly backing away from these two lovebirds in an attempt not to get notice but maybe it was his lucky day because just in time Jeonghan whipped his head to his side and saw Jihoon.

"Hey Jihoon! Good morning. Enjoying your stay here?" Asked the older boy with a smile plastered in his face.

He too, plastered a smile in his face "Yes" he replied shortly not polite enough to reciprocate the greetings he got.

"Good. I just passed by to drop your things in here" and he brought his attention back to Seungcheol "You know your father is quite unpredictable. God! I missed my boyfriend's ..." 

It was shortly cut as he took it as sign to resign back into the house.

He looked pitifully at the neat crispy pata in the table and at his arms as if he can see through the fabrics of his sweatshirt where his burns are situated.

Poor little thing, he was denied the privilege to do what he gotta do.

For the crispy Pata, to be tasted and enjoyed by Choi Seungcheol.

For Jihoon, to be of help to Seungcheol.

It was a void feeling inside him, again. Feeling worthless and all. God! Seungcheol, what do you want me to do?

He goes straight to the living room and just decided to watch television, easiest way to distract himself and the rumbling ache in his stomach.

\-----

"Good Morning sunshines~ Let me water you so you'll blossom soon enough and show your beauty to Jihoonie. Okay?" He talked with the daffodils and anemones.

Talking with the plants make them grow faster, prettier and maybe talking with plants can vent out a little of the stress you're feeling. Because plants unlike humans won't judge you, well they don't have a choice.

It is a beautiful morning indeed proportionate to what he's feeling. This is their first day in this tiny house, a house for the JiCheol couple. That's how they call their loveteam back in the College. Ji for Jihoon and Cheol for Seungcheol. It was supposed to be CheolHoon but Jihoon is so stubborn, wanting to be the "top" of their loveteam, looking back it's so cute -- endearing rather.

"Come drink up, beautiful creatures" he said as he pour water to the flowers.

"So... What? You're going to water this flowers? What the fuck Cheol? It just rained. Are you killing them?"

Said a distant voice but as he searched his surroundings he found out that that voice came from his head, a distant memory of Jihoon nagging.

⌛⌛⌛

Seungcheol was caught picking up the roses in their University's garden, everone knew that the Dean treasured those roses like her own precious sons. Well, it was beautiful and Seungcheol wanted to give it to Jihoon but he was busted.

"So, Mr. Choi ... I know the roses are beautiful right?"

"Indeed Ma'am"

The Dean's office was the terror of any student, he's not an exception to it. He can be kicked out in just one flick of the Dean's hand, well, not really because he will recite all law he know if that ever happen.

The wall was littered with expensive painting. Abstract paintings, he never really knew why such paintings are called an art? It's just a dynamic of color, maybe the painter just threw the palette into the canvas. But he found new meaning to this arts, one portrays a feeling of hope and the other is dreadful. He just knew just by looking at it and the color used was emanating those feelings.

"How many did you pick, Mr. Choi?"

"3 Ma'am" 

He answered straight to the point. Well, three roses for "I love you", Seungcheol is a cliché man.

" God! Oh my God! You just killed three of my son! Do you know what you did, Mr. Choi?"

The Dean threw a fit but Seungcheol doesn't look at her. She might be glaring daggers at him but he would never know.

And that's how he got here with a sprinkler in his hand. He was punished to take care of the greenhouse for the whole semester. It wasn't really a punishment for him, everyone knows he love flowers but it was such a hassle because he needs to water it everyday even on days he doesn't have a class and even on days it just rained.

Plushes of mud were sticking to his shoes. Let me just water these and leave.

"So... What? You're going to water this flowers? What the fuck Cheol? It just rained. Are you killing them?"

Jihoon, his Jihoon was standing at the entrance of the greenhouse with hands in his waist.

"I need to. The Dean want me to water it everyday" he reasoned.

Jihoon rolled his eyes.

"Idiot. That's what you get when you are so full of yourself. You know I don't like flowers and you'd got yourself into trouble because of that"

Jihoon was upset. He knew it not because of what he just said but because he made him worry. He let go of the sprinklers and made his way towards Jihoon, mindless of the splutter of mud his pants were getting each step.

"I'm sorry, Jihoonie. I just that thought I can be creative in saying I love you" he said as he held Jihoon's head into his chest.

Jihoon sighed in his chest and curled his finger into the hem of Seungcheol's shirt "You can just tell an outright I love you Cheol. It is always so creative and magical if it came from you"

He fell silent. Jihoon was always so prank but he's always so sweet. 

"Cheol?" Jihoon looked up straight into his eyes. He hummed in return.

"I love you too" Jihoon said with overflowing love in it.

⏳⏳⏳

Open Sesame.

That was the word that pulled him back to reality.

"Seungcheol, please open the gate and lift up this burden your father bestow upon me" 

Jeonghan was standing outside the small gate of their tiny house, behind him were a car.

"What are you doing here?" 

Jeonghan raised a brow "Well Your Highness, open this gate and we'll talk. God! Why are you so cold to me?"

He opened it but Jeonghan turned his back on him just to come back with all their belongings in his hand.

"Your father! God! I'm not a servant but he's making me do this things"

Loads of luggages were being put by Jeonghan inside their tiny house and after he was done he stood in front of Seungcheol that is still in the garden.

"How's Jisoo?" 

Jeonghan studied him. "I saw you last week and you had gotten much thinner Seungcheol. Are you even eating?"

"So how's Jisoo?" 

He opened his backpack and got out a small container which contains fruit, specifically grapes.

"Open up" he said.

A grape were in front of his mouth.

"I'm taking my supplements Jeonghan. No need to worry about me" he said as he gently swat Jeonghan's hand.

"Supplements? That's all you eat? I mean that's not eating technically... Eat real foods Seungcheol"

"Nothing is real food now, Jeonghan. All foods are artificial now. Do you want the details of my research?"

Jeonghan shook his head and placed the grape into his lips.

"Never mind! Now open up, it's just one piece. Say Ahhh"

Defeated. He opened his mouth and let the grape fell in his mouth.

Jeonghan smiled in victory "Now, I wonder where's Jihoon" he looked for him like a vulture surrounding it's prey.

"Hey Jihoon! Good morning. Enjoying your stay here?" As soon as he spotted Jihoon.

Jihoon just woke up as it is evident to his appearance and Seungcheol just want to melt in his spot because Jihoon looked so sexy with his messy hair and somewhat unfocused eyes.

"Yes" a short reply by Jihoon.

"Good. I just passed by to drop your things in here" 

Soon after, he bring back his attention to Seungcheol. 

"You know your father is quite unpredictable. God! I missed my boyfriend's Skype session because of this and now I have to wait for another day"

Jeonghan continued talking but his attention were on a certain creature who went back inside the house.

Jeonghan and Jihoon never got along in college. Jeonghan was the angel, the prominent beauty but Jihoon was the fairy whom only a few can really see how aesthetic he is and also because Jeonghan was subject to Jihoon's jealousy multiple times. He wonder if he still felt the same with Jeonghan even thought they aren't together.

"Jisoo was good! I'm going to LA a week or so and your cousin wants me to look after you in the time being, like am I a babysitter? So yeah I obeyed coz I love him so what time can I visit?"

"No"

"What?" Jeonghan threw a questioning look.

"Don't visit. I'll let my cousin know you're visiting everyday. Just don't visit again"

It was rude of him. He knew it but he wants his remaining thread of life to be filled only with Jihoon and him.

Jeonghan quickly picked up "Okay. Goodluck with Jihoon, I'm going now"

He watched as Jeonghan went back to his car and drove away.

\----

He went in with the television on and with Jihoon in the couch talking to the phone.

"Seungcheol what is address of this house?"

A question was directed unto him as soon as Jihoon saw him so he answered quickly. He felt obliged to do it.

"Yeah. That's it. I think you can come here. Yes Soonyoung."

The second he heard Soonyoung's name everything went wirey, his blood were boiling. That shit.

"Jeonghan dropped our things, you can take a bath..." he was interrupted by Jihoon's stomach who rumbled loudly "... I'll cook, you can eat after you took a bath"

He was boiling before but all of that subsided when he heard it. Like, it was just Jihoon's stomach announcing that he's empty but for Seungcheol it was the cutest thing for today, well, after Jihoonie.

"Okay" was all Jihoon said with his head down but Seungcheol knows he was red and embarrassed to death.

He quickly got up and gone straight to their common bathroom.

Well, Jihoonie -- you don't even have  clothes with you. He would like to say that but the bathroom's door was long closed.

\----

Falls of water were washing into him and it felt so good, so right. It felt so medicinal -- in a sense that it is taking the pain from the burns he got last night away. Felt so good...

Until he was done taking a bath and found out he had nothing, no clothes or towel.

He ransacked the cabinet to find a towel and Thank god there is.He quickly took one, dried himself and threw it in his lower body.

Oblivious that the towel has the word "Jihoonie" sewed into it.

"So now... How can I go out?" He talked to himself at the mirror.

He wouldn't mind if Seungcheol would see him naked but that seems unethical.

Carefully opening the door, he poked out his head to see if Seungcheol was anywhere in sight. When he was sure Seungcheol won't see him, he run for his life -- straight to his room which is luckily just a few step from the bathroom.

But still he doesn't have his clothes inside the room. How stupid of him.

He can be the brightest kid at school but he's the dumbest and clumsiest when he's with Seungcheol.

It happened so quickly that Jihoon doesn't even bother looking out for Seungcheol. It only took a moment -- 90seconds -- to transfer his belongings inside the room. Considering the amount of luggages he had, that was quite a record.

Blue knitted shirt with white ripped shorts or black sweater with gray pants -- it was like a first date and he was that fucking annoying girl who never got to made her mind what to wear. His burns were still visible so he choose the latter.

The luggages were piled up in the corner of his room, he decided he'll just organize it later. 

A perfume. 

He ought to use it now but he did not.

The table were platerred with food maybe made by Seungcheol or brought by Jeonghan, he doesn't really care now because he's too hungry to think.

He made his way to the chair and gently sit on it even though he want to attack the food in front of him now.

He realized it was just for 1 person, one empty plate, 1 pair of spoon and fork, either it's for him or for Seungcheol himself but Jihoon knew it was for him. I bet he was full by getting spoonfeed by Jeonghan.

He eyed the food like a predator who doesn't eat for a whole fortnigt long and this one prey is infront of him.

"Take your sweaters off"

His looked at Seungcheol to see the mischievous smirk but there wasn't any.

Well that was unexpected, are we going to make out now? Can't I just eat first and after that I'll eat you?

\----

Jihoon's cute, cuter than his rumbling stomach and the cutest in the whole wide atmosphere.

He saw it all, how Jihoon run as fast as lightning from the bathroom to his room. He looked like a bunny hopping it's way. 

The door of Jihoon's room opened again and now he really doesn't care if somebody will see him so he took the opportunity and stare at the smallest thing Jihoon's doing.

How his wet hair falls perfectly to his forehead, how toned Jihoon's body is, how the milky skin of Jihoon made him more ethereal and somewhat delicious to see and how long and slender his fingers are. And then he stopped admiring the view because someone just littered on it.

Blotches of red were evident on Jihoon's skin. As soon as Jihoon was inside his room again, he went to his room and ransacked the place for an ointment.

He found a wide variety of ointment in his room. He wasn't really sure what are those red blotches so he gather it all.

Sweater to hide it.

That's what Jihoon is wearing. He looked pitifully at the most precious creature in the world.

"Take your sweaters off" he said.

Jihoon looked at him with so much shock.

"Uhhhh, I saw there were blotches of red in your skin. I just wonder if what happened and I brought ointments" he revealed the variety of ointments 

Jihoon was still wide eyed.

"Ohhhh" was Jihoon's only reaction.

Jihoon looked at the food and to him and back to the food and back to him again.

"C-can I just eat first?"

And for Seungcheol that was the cutest response he could get.

"Sure" and Jihoon started digging the food.

Seungcheol missed eating real foods just by looking at Jihoon eating it so deliciously but that doesn't help if your digestive system wasn't doing what they are supposed to do.

He burped after finishing all the foods he prepared.

"You really don't have to do this Seungcheol. You can just give me the ointment and I'll do it." 

Seungcheol situated himself beside Jihoon, he was in front of Jihoon before.

"Just take your sweaters off"

He did as he was told and soon the red blotches were in front of him. He swear in his mind.

"What ointment should I apply?"

He pointed to the ointment for burns. And Seungcheol just wonder where he got this.

The moment his fingers got in touch with Jihoon's bare skin, he can feel like he was beinh burned too -- good kind of burn.

It was so soft, so smooth that Seungcheol didn't realize he was done with Jihoon's both arms until Jihoon's hand stopped him from applying more.

He didn't let it go. He looked up to see Jihoon also looking at him. 

His eyes speak of something that Seungcheol can't decipher. Something in it make him caress Jihoon's cheeks, something in it says that Jihoon likes it and something in it make Seungcheol dip and meet Jihoon's lips.

It speak of longing, love and remembering. That's what Seungcheol see when their kiss started of as sweet but gone done to sloppy rough kisses 

Pancakes with maple syrup.

He can taste it from Jihoon and just in time when Seungcheol assured himself that his interpretations were right, Jihoon stopped kissing him. His world stopped revolving.

"Sorry" Jihoon said and gone back straight to his room again.

Fuck. 

That was their second kiss.

\----

**Author's Note:**

> [A/N: Hello~ Any thoughts about this story? ^^, Kudos if you like. Anything you think is lacking? Critisms are more than welcome! Thank you!]


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